How Many Ways Dost Thou Suckest?

Now that Seattle is a two-sport town, the Mariners are doing a great job of stinking up almost the entire sports section. It wasn't just their putrid present that sullied the front page, but also their organizational ineptitude on the back page that caught my eye this morning. The Seattle Times periodically lists the standings of the Mariners' minor-league teams, and what an eyefeast it is.

Showing that the nut doesn't fall far from the tree, all of the Mariners' minor league teams have losing records:

Tacoma Rainiers (AAA) 50-52
West Tennessee (AA) 11-19
Wisconsin (A) 7-23 (?!)
High Desert (A) 12-19
Everett (A) 15-19

If you're scoring at home, that's a combined 95-132 record. Throw in the parent club's tab and it's 133-193. It's hard to be 60 games below .500 in anything, but the Mariners are doing just fine, thank you very much.

On the other hand, one of the must put-upon franchises of all time, the Chicago Cubs, currently have winners at all levels of their system. Never mind the Cubs themselves have the best record in the NL.

Since I had some time on my hands, I decided to compare the Mariners' organizational "prowess" with their opponents in the AL West. It's not pretty.

Angels organization:

LA Angels of Orange County, CA, USA 60-39
Salt Lake (AAA) 60-42
Arkansas (AA) 9-22 (But won their division's first-half title)
Rancho Cucamonga (A) 17-13
Cedar Rapids (A) 15-15
Orem (Rookie) 22-11

Angels' organization record: 183-142

Texas Rangers' organization:

Texas 52-48
Oklahoma (AAA) 58-45
Frisco (AA) 19-12 (Also won divisional first-half title)
Bakersfield (A) 13-18
Clinton (A) 14-17 (Won first-half title)
Spokane (A) 26-8

Rangers' organizational record: 182-148

Oakland A's organization:

Oakland 51-48
Sacramento (AAA) 60-42
Midland (AA) 15-16
Stockton (A) 13-17
Kane County (A) 11-19
Vancouver (A) 14-20

A's organizational record: 164-162

If you're still reading, congratulations. You're probably like me and feel better knowing that the Mariners are really 50.5 games behind the Angels, rather than the 22 games the standings would have you believe. It's in these numbers that the putrid legacy of Bill Bavasi really shows itself. This is a deep hole that takes time to dig and time to get out of. And it assures us that while the Mariners' present is a blot on the sports pages, the future looks bleak too.