If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must force the Sonics to honor their lease obligations

In today's hearing to determine the immediate fate of the Sonics, the city called Sherman Alexie, National Book Award Winner and sometime professor at the University of Washington. Prof. Alexie was called to prove... um, I'm not sure.

Some highlights:

• On why he likes the NBA: "The great thing is that they wear such little clothes. You can see their muscles."
• On why he likes Key Arena: "The way to feel less like a freak is to be in a room with freaks. So that’s what KeyArena is like. I’m in a room with all of these freaks from all over the world."
• On why he likes being a season ticket holder: "[It's like] being like a high roller in Vegas."
• On why the Sonics shouldn't leave: "I want two more years of the Greek Gods."

I'm not sure what the hell any of this is supposed to prove. I'm starting to wonder if the city is trying to employ the fabled Chewbacca Defense for the first time in a civil case.